Me and my life. Talking.
Today, we are talking about marriage and freedom; about family and obligation. We are talking about friendship and ‘being there.’
Here’s a peek inside of that conversation,as it unfolded a few minutes ago. I offer it to inspire you to listen in on your own. (Note: the ‘you’ in this conversation is not a specific person. What I’m seeing is the way that I project this relationship onto everyone in my life. And that’s fascinating me… and, yes, sometimes it is also upsetting me.)
Not running away. Rather, turning away – gently, simply, easily – from struggle and arguing and the illusion that we will ever get this thing so ‘right’ that it will never again need work, need inquiry, need exploration.
Easing away. Not pushing you (or anything else) away.
Rather, I am turning toward what calls to me – drawing ME nearer and I shift toward what feels whole and right and aligned.
there is this core of something inside of me. something that knows what feels right and what feels out of alignment with that ‘rightness.’ (and you will notice that i did not use the word ‘wrong’ – nothing feels’ wrong’ anymore. There is only what feels aligned, resonant and what does not.)
This core, this knowing that grows more clarified each day.
Not abandoning you, but no longer abandoning ME
- nor shifting away from my own peace in order to alleviate your anxiety.
- nor shifting away from my own joy in order to alleviate your sadness.
Shifting toward occupying ME
- this body
- this knowing
- this space in the worldNot harming you, but no longer harming me in order to keep you at peace.nor shearing off,tearing off orselling off pieces of my soul to save yours.Breaking free of the illusion of bondagebreaking free of ‘being there’ for others when being there means not being here.Seeing that when I live in the present moment, there is only love.Shifting away from anything that pulls me farther from this love.Shifting, daily shifting, toward love.