Whenever Mom gets to feeling anxious - which happens to her a lot - she looks at me and asks, "What is that thing we say?" and, knowing just what she means, I say, "So what.""Yes," she sighs, sinking back into her pillows. "So what."What we mean is: So what that I am feeling this way or that way? There is no story here - no drama to get caught up in.There is no need to spin ourselves into a frenzy trying to figure out WHY she is feeling anxious. We don't need to know the cause or the cure.All of that just holds our attention on the anxiety - which gives it more power - and makes it increase.We've found that when we meet her anxiety with our secret code, asking, "So what?" the anxiety just sits there, not bothering anyone.